On the Feminist Housewives community, a member was distressed about how she was treated by another forum. She was mainly a lurker on the site until someone's posts ruffled her feathers. As the owner of a polarizing site, I run into this all of the time, especially with hate mail. Here are some tips to deal with internet harassment:
- The thing that I had to learn about other forums is that they should be treated like private clubs.
- Whether they are jerks or not, everyone deserves a place to feel safe. Intruding will immediately create a mob of angry people. Even if your argument is platonically sound, they will not listen to you. They will treat you poorly and you don't deserve that.
- If you are new to the community and post an angry message, they will not listen to you. You will be immediately marked troll, whether or not you are right.
- If you start a discussion with people solely because you are angry with them, they will not be persuaded.
- Always assume lack of knowledge before lack of intelligence
- Walk away from the computer and do something physical for a while, like a few dishes. This will help you clear your mind and evaluate the actual value of posting a response.
- If you'd still like to point out the mistake once you've calmed down, support it with sources that your audience trusts. For instance, a Christian forum would be much more likely to listen to verses from the Bible then passages from an atheist book.
Be civil and polite. If they do not discuss a well reasoned, calmly put post with you, it's time to move on to your own internet club.
