This is one of the many comments I want to share with you from my MiscarriageHelp.com support site. The words of women and their families help us to gain a better understanding of the painful, emotional ride after miscarriage. This applies not only to women, but to men & other family members, too. Any typos in the 'comment' remain because I didn't want to take the liberty to change someone else's words. Thank you for your understanding, and blessings to you.
Ellen, Host of MiscarriageHelp.com Miscarriage: "Should I name my baby?"
Hello Everyone,
Love and light to you today. I hope you're doing well and gaining strength as the days go by after miscarriage.
Today's angel message from my Perpetual Angel Calendar by Doreen Virtue is: "We are the angels who are among you night and day, and who steadfastly refuse to see you in any way except by the holy light that burns within you."
A comment came in from Michelle, and she is asking if any of us have suggestions as to whether or not she should name the baby she has just lost to miscarriage. Please read her comment below, and if anyone has any supportive words to offer, please do so.
Blessings to you,
Ellen
Michelle says:
Hello Ladies,
I just found out last week, I have miscarried. I am still in the process (I guess that is how you say it). It is all still new to me and I feel like I am in a whirlwind.
My husband is wonderful, but doesn't understand why I am still searching for help.
I was only 8 weeks pregnant. I want to name my child, but don't know if that will make it easier or harder. Any suggestions?
Dear Michelle,
I am so sorry for your loss. It's very difficult to be miscarrying as we speak and I pray for you to have the strength you need to get through this time.
Your husband IS wonderful, as you said, but, he doesn't really 'get' where you are coming from. A life inside you has died, and it doesn't matter how far along in your pregnancy you were. There's a bond you formed, even if you found out after the fact- and were miscarrying when you actually discovered you were pregnant. You're in a tough spot.
I think naming your child will make it easier. That's only my opinion, and I will post your comment so others can add their feelings, too. I know my baby's name all these years later, and it's been sixteen. I still refer to him as Alex, and for some reason, it does give me comfort to know his name. I think it serves to validate my baby's life- although very short here on earth with me. He WAS here, and I feel he counted for something. By naming him, I feel closer to him- his spiritual self.
As the days go on, please try to remember that you have every right to grieve and take things a day at a time. Like I said before, it doesn't matter how far along in your pregnancy you were- you are dealing with a loss and it's not easy- by a long shot.
We're all here for you and I wish you many blessings, comfort, understanding and love.
Ellen
A new comment in response to Michelle's, from Laura:
Dear Michelle,
I just wrote about my miscarriage 2 days ago. (I miscarried 2 months ago). During my miscarriage I had this incredible need to name my baby. I just know she was a girl and I needed to be able to say my Isabella Grace was REAL and with me, if even for a short time. I don't know what most people do, but it was very comforting to me. I pray that you get through this awful process as quickly and painlessly as possible. Take good care of yourself.
Love
Laura
|
|
|
|
Contributor's Note
This is taken directly from my blog/support site, MiscarriageHelp.com
|
|
|
|
|
